By Daniel Rigney
When it comes to carrying cell phones in public, every state in the Union is "open carry." In public places from coast to coast, Americans are either talking directly into to their slim plastic rectangles or bowing their heads raptly in textual prayer. Most communications in our country now travel electronically rather than face to face. And so be it.
Yet not all Americans opt to exercise their Constitutional right to keep and bear phones in public. Here are twelve reasons to consider not doing so unless it's really necessary.
You’ll no longer be a slave to your pocket master.
You won’t annoy everyone within earshot by chattering with invisible people.
When out on the town, you won’t be tempted to take a selfie you’ll regret later.
You won’t be getting calls from anyone you don’t want to talk to.
It will be harder for advertisers, creditors, and NSA to stalk you.
You won’t have to reset your device before every movie or flight.
You won’t be interrupted while you’re trying to concentrate on something more important, like solving a crossword puzzle.
You can bolster the self-esteem of people who enjoy feeling superior to the less technologically fortunate.
Or you can tell these same people you’ve had a phone surgically implanted in your ear, and have no need for “outmoded external devices” like theirs. (“Are you really still carrying a cell phone?”)
Your phone never needs recharging, because it’s always plugged in at home.
You’ll protect your hard-earned reputation as a selective Luddite -- a maverick who doesn’t always run with the electronic herd.
You won’t have to endure jokes like “Is that a cell phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”
Bonus Reasons:
You’ll weigh slightly less without your cell appendage.
And did I mention fatal cell-related car crashes?
Danagram
:] … sweeping back the tide of history since 2011.
When it comes to carrying cell phones in public, every state in the Union is "open carry." In public places from coast to coast, Americans are either talking directly into to their slim plastic rectangles or bowing their heads raptly in textual prayer. Most communications in our country now travel electronically rather than face to face. And so be it.
Yet not all Americans opt to exercise their Constitutional right to keep and bear phones in public. Here are twelve reasons to consider not doing so unless it's really necessary.
You’ll no longer be a slave to your pocket master.
You won’t annoy everyone within earshot by chattering with invisible people.
When out on the town, you won’t be tempted to take a selfie you’ll regret later.
You won’t be getting calls from anyone you don’t want to talk to.
It will be harder for advertisers, creditors, and NSA to stalk you.
You won’t have to reset your device before every movie or flight.
You won’t be interrupted while you’re trying to concentrate on something more important, like solving a crossword puzzle.
You can bolster the self-esteem of people who enjoy feeling superior to the less technologically fortunate.
Or you can tell these same people you’ve had a phone surgically implanted in your ear, and have no need for “outmoded external devices” like theirs. (“Are you really still carrying a cell phone?”)
Your phone never needs recharging, because it’s always plugged in at home.
You’ll protect your hard-earned reputation as a selective Luddite -- a maverick who doesn’t always run with the electronic herd.
You won’t have to endure jokes like “Is that a cell phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”
Bonus Reasons:
You’ll weigh slightly less without your cell appendage.
And did I mention fatal cell-related car crashes?
Danagram
:] … sweeping back the tide of history since 2011.
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